Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Thee Dollhouse of Tampa

Had the chance to stop over at Thee Dollhouse Friday afternoon and celebrate the end of another week. When I think weekend i don't hear the closing bell in my mind I hear Motley Crue blaring out the 1987 classic "Girls Girls Girls". It always takes a while for the eyes to adjust to the dim neon lights but when they do it's like the scene from The Wizard of Oz going from black and white to Technicolor..... Let the good times roll!!!

The first thing I noticed was how clean the whole club was, I mean immaculate! Nothing ruins a good time more than hearing your freshly shined shoes stick to the floor. Never had to worry about that at Thee Dollhouse as it was spotless from the door to the bathroom. O.K. the vacumed floor and freshly shined bar may not have been the FIRST thing I noticed but it definitly adds to the overall experience.

You will notice one thing or rather one thing missing from the stage at Thee Dollhouse, there is no pole. Thats right there is no poll dancing which is unusual to say the least when talking about Gentlemans clubs. At first this may be a little disappointing however after a while I came to the realization that this makes for a much classier experience. We have all seen a girl swing around a pole, climb up to the top like a monkey, or occassionally fall off a pole (when this happens it is usually the most entertaining part of that new girls dance routine). Needless to say if you want to see a pole dance there are a million other places you can go, but if you want a classier experience you will find it at Thee Dollhouse.

The girls on stage do the classsic three song routine getting down to a G-string and Pasty's for the third song. So if you see a girl you want to tip ("and remember guys seats at the main stage are reserved for tipping customers only") make sure you get up there by the third song or you might miss your chance. Remember these girls are smart if you are the guy tipping them not only will you get more attention while they are on stage but you may enjoy more conversation with them when they are not on stage.

This brings me to the next point I found most of the entertainers at Thee Dollhouse to understand why most of the guys in my group were there and respect that. Me I was just there for some drinks and a nice view and maybe some light conversation the girls respected that and didn't hound me for a dance. When I politely declined one offer I was not met with hostility or passive agression that occurs at many other places, the girl understood and we exchanged "maybe next time's". The guy to my right was there for the first time and it was obvious, he had trouble keeping his head from swiveling around 360 degrees as some of the finest women in Tampa walked behind him. The girls took notice of him chatted him up and when it was time for a dance the girl put a smile on his face that lasted untill I left which was about 30 minutes later! Ohhh there was also a guy with us who simply wanted dances and found a girl who was happy to oblige, I mean this guy came in with a mission and was successfull. We have all had the friend that goes into the club and disappears in back never to be heard from again untill it is time to leave, this was him and all he said when leaving was "That was Awsome!!!!".

The dances there run $20 per song however there are a couple promotions out there that allow you to get 2-4-1's. You can either get there early durring the week, wait for the "DJ special" which you'll know when you hear it, or buy the promotions mentioned in a prevoius blog that get you 50% off EVERYTHING till 10 P.M. M-F. So if you are looking to make the most of your money in today's tight economy Thee Dollhouse offers unbeatable offers.

The drinks there are average to slightly above average priced for a gentleman's club. Bottle of domestic will run you around $5 and cocktails $6-7. However if you are there at the right time or buy their promotions ahead of time you can cut your spending in half with 2-4-1's. The bartender who made my drink (Tanqueray and Tonic) did a great job and was promptly ready to make another one as I finished the first. I was also impressed by her recollection of me and my drink from the last time I had been there was over a month ago!

Overall I was impressed by Thee Dollhouse and it's staff, I would highly reccomend it as an afterwork club and will be visiting again for a late night critique soon!


By the numbers/grades
Time visited: Friday 5-7 PM
Ratio: Mabye 20 customers or so in the club, 13-15 entertainers
Entertainment Quality: B+ (for an afternoon/early evening shift there were enough good looking girls to keep everyone happy, looking forward to a visit later at night)
Speed of drink service: A no wait
Quality/Strength of drinks: A- Strong, but not too strong
Appearance setup of Club: A+ Clean, large main stage, 2nd stage near bar. High class option that is different from most of the other clubs around.
Affordability: B with no promotions, very average. A+ when the bill is cut in half with prepurchased promotions!

Monday, October 19, 2009

Discounts Now Available!!

Guys the ink has finally dried and it is all of us guys that will bennefit. Amplifi Marketing now has your ticket to Thee Dollhouse..... and you will not believe the deal being offered!

We all know the feeling of waking up the next day and first looking in your pockets from the night before, hoping against hope to find a twenty or two.... NOTHING. Then opening the wallet and finding nothing but a folded up five and 3 crisp ones, sure you don't know why you are left with $8 maybe you were saving it for the taxi, or more likely a late night run for the border at Taco Bell!

At this point you are going back through the night thinking about the various places you spent money doing some quick math and thinking, "That wasn't too big of a night." Then you remember that stop which ended up being a lot longer than the 20 minutes your friend told you it would be. You curse the $8.00 ATM fee, smile when thinking about how YOU got the hottest girl in the club to give you a dance, and finally begin to wonder just how much money you spent there. $40? $80? Then you remember the bar tab was $80something which you picked up because two of your friends didn't want to hit the ATM and you were feeling like a rock star! GULP how much money did you shell out at that place..... lets not think about it and just get to work.

It's mid morning Friday morning, the coffee has kicked in and hangover is gone all good news.... Now it's time to face the music and log into your account..... $122.77, must have left a good tip. right below that you see the $68 ATM withdrawal. So $8, to get $60???? what the hell is that all about!!! $200......... and two thoughts come to mind. How the hell did I spend that much money in under two hours? And the guys definitly owe me a couple rounds this weekend!

We all know Gentlemans Clubs/Strip Clubs can be a great time but they can also be disproportionally expensive hour for hour when considering other options for the night. Then again we always have one hell of a time so depriving yourself of this time honored tradition is just plain mean. It is time to cut that bill in HALF! I'm not talking about skipping the lap dances (that would be unamerican, how else are these girls going to pay their college tuition) or being the jerk that doesn't know how to tip.

This Marketing company has come to me with a promotion wich gives the buyer $40 worth of club entry, services, and drinks for only $20. Right now these promotions are available for use at Thee Dollhouse here in Tampa as well as The Penthouse Club. I spoke to the President of Amplifi and he explained that the vouchers could be used Monday-Friday untill 10P.M, and that they didn't have any cash value outside the clubs. The promotion starts Thursday which is perfect as I plan on using the promotion Friday and postin my first club review of Thee Dollhouse this weekend!

After seeing the bills or "Dollhouse Dollars" as they are called I am impressed by the artwork and think these are a must for any Man's Man in Tampa. I am having a little bit of a problem now though because sometimes I try to put a number on the cash I plan on spending at a club and do my best to stay within that budget. Right now I am having trouble figuring out whether I should spend the same amount of money and have twice the fun, or save half the money....... For all my efforts to save money in this tough economy and as much as I tell mysef I should save money, I think it is a safe bet I'll be looking for twins Friday!

Ohh ya if anyone wants these halfprice dollhouse dollars call 813-402-6912. Or email tampaclubs4half@hotmail.com


-VINCE